so many things going through my head now... plus the headache urrgghh!!!
been thinking for the past week about that meeting with mr. d and i got to let go some steam
so pardon the fancy language

to mr. d:
first of all, thanks a lot for ruining my sip. yea you bloody twoface s.o.b. you left me all alone on the first day while you went to do your stuff. oh yes and i still remb those nice words you said to me when it was my "last day", ooh all so encouraging. but nooo... once you found out i was staying, everything changed. and you had to go reservist just as i was picking myself up from all the mess. nothing wrong with that, serving the nation wad. yea you bloody didn't make plans for me while you were away, you left just like that. and you like to talk to me about responsibility, wah that you are some assistant district commander and you know all abt leadership and all. well, you fucking leader left me just when i needed you most and you didnt even showed that you care so why must i? you told me that i have only a month left and i should enjoy my time. and then you probably realised your mistake that you hadn't done anything as a supervisor other than get me to wash and clean those friggin tanks. yea and you tried to blame it on me by saying that i should BUG YOU to give me more stuff to do. LISTEN CLOSELY FUCKER, DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU HOW TO DO YOUR FUCKING JOB??? fine blame it all to me, take away that small amount of dignity i have left. thanks ar mr. assistant district commander, thanks for showing me how political you can get. oh and did i mention that although you said you were going to grade my performance, you decided it was time to relax and took LEAVE UNTIL NEXT YEAR. how are you going to grade me? the time you spent with me was even lesser than the time i spent in the toilet man. oh yes, and to your disappointment, you wont even get to give me a grade. yea, that's for the LO, not you!! so if you think so highly about yourself and that nobody knows you are trying to cover up for your mistake or laziness, please take a long hard look at yourself. I depended on you, I trusted you, I looked up to you, I even tolerated your bloody winniethepooh snigger. you let me down man, BIG TIME. and now, you left me ALONE AGAIN to pick up the pieces. Thanks man, good night and fuck you.

phew... that was a mouthful
ok hope this christmas would be good
everyday just seems so empty now, and the friggin headache is killing me!!!!